CHAPTER 7: All About The Best Anal Sex Toys

Maybe the word anal makes you squeamish. Maybe anal sex is your status quo. Either way, there’s something you should know: butt stuff is on the rise. It’s on everybody’s agenda. And that’s not about to change.

In 2010 the Journal of Sexual Medicine confirmed some suspicions: 40% of women 20-24 years old have had anal sex. Between 1992 and 2010, the number of 18 and 19-year-olds who had tried anal sex increased by 20%. Anal sex is often associated with promiscuity, yet it’s most common in relationships and married couples.

Anal penetration is common among men, too. Anal sex makes up a third of the sexual activity in gay relationships, according to the Journal of Sexual Medicine. But anal sex isn’t just for homosexuality. In fact, a national survey by the CDC proved that 44% of straight men have had anal sex at least once in their life.

What all these statistics really tell us is that anal play is for everyone with an asshole. It’s the most nondiscriminatory kind of sex there is. It’s something both sexes can both give and receive. No wonder it’s spreading like wildfire.

Why Does Anal Sex With Toys Feel Good?

Okay, so it’s popular. A lot of questionable things gain popularity, just look at America’s 2016 election. But does it actually feel good, or are we doing it for the thrill?

Valid question, but anal sex actually feels good in a physiological sense. Of course it feels good for those with a dick, since the anal entrance is tighter than any other orifice. But it’s pleasuring on the receiving end too, though it’s a little different for men and women.

Male anal sex can be wildly pleasuring. The reason for this is his prostate gland, which can be stimulated from inside the rectum. Stimulating the prostate gland via anal sex toys or intercourse can elicit mind-altering prostate orgasms without even touching the penis. Any guy who has had a prostate orgasm can attest that this is where the money’s at. And sex toy manufacturers might just confirm it.

Here’s one question everyone is wondering, does anal sex feel good for women?

Yes. But for a woman, the pleasure is a bit different since they don’t have a prostate gland. Some women say anal penetration stimulates their G-spot enough to orgasm, but it varies. There are tons of nerve endings at the anal entrance, so pleasure is a reality. (Especially when you add a little clitoral action.)

Different Types of Anal Toys

The range of anal toys covers all experience levels, from hesitant beginners to the anally obsessed.

Just because you don’t like butt plugs doesn’t mean you won’t enjoy a nice, vibrating dildo. Assholes are picky. It takes experimentation to find a toy that finally gives you the anal pleasure everyone’s raving about.

Assholes are picky.”

Different types of anal toys will provide different sensations. Keep that in mind. While it’s nice to grab a toy that aims for G-spot or P-spot stimulation, many people crave anal toys simply for the sensation of being “filled.” Feeling “full” is the first way to start experiencing anal penetration. From that point, you can use toys to target pleasure spots with some advanced techniques.

Here are the different categories of basic anal toys to get you started

Butt Plugs

A basic butt plug excites the nerve endings around the entrance of your anus, while providing the “full” feeling. They can vary in width, from narrow to thick, as well as length. Butt plugs are narrow on one end for smooth entrance and have a flared base to keep the toy from getting lost inside. I like the butt plug set by Lyps, which offers four different sizes to train your anus, so to speak.

Butt plugs are too much fun. Not only are they perfect for beginners because of their mild size and function; you can wear them during sex or foreplay to heighten your arousal. You can even beautify your behind with a little bejeweled butt plug. You’ll be irresistible.  

If you’re crazy about vibration, try a vibrating butt plug. A lot of people think it’s the royal treatment, but some find it distracts them from the penetrative feeling. There’s only one way to determine your preference, and it’s to try both.

The Lyps Uranus

Made with 100% nonpourous FDA approved medical grade silicone. It’s incredibly soft, but most importantly… totally non-toxic and extremely easy to use and clean.

  • With 10 different vibration settings, the Lyps Aphrodite will push you to the edge of climax over and over (and you’ll never get sick of it).

Anal Beads

Half the fun of anal play is the basic nature of sticking something up your ass, honestly. That’s where most the nerve endings are anyways. Anal beads play to that idea. They are a strand of connected beads, and increase in size from one end to the other. To use anal beads, you put in one bead at time. Since each progressive bead is bigger, you feel more as you work up the strand.

At the end of the strand is a handle to pull the beads out. One particularly orgasmic strategy is to pull them out right at the moment of climax. For your first time anal beads, try the Fun Factory Bendy Beads. They are beginner-friendly, safe, and likely to open your eyes to the joys of anal pleasure.

Anal Dildos

Anal dildos are for those who want an even fuller feeling. They are more intense than butt plugs and anal beads because they take up more space, which is exactly why they’re a staple in most repertoires. An anal dildo is different than a regular dildo because it has a flared base. The last thing you want is to lose your dildo in the abyss. Anal dildos are also smoother to protect fragile anal tissues.

The Lyps 8″ Realistic Dildo

Made with 100% nonpourous FDA approved medical grade silicone. It’s incredibly soft, but most importantly… totally non-toxic and extremely easy to use and clean.

  • With 10 different vibration settings, the Lyps Aphrodite will push you to the edge of climax over and over (and you’ll never get sick of it).

If you are a beginner, start with an anal dildo that has a diameter from .75 to 1.5 inches. This 8” Realistic Silicone Dildo by Lyps should do the trick. There are also vibrating or inflatable anal dildos, if you’re craving something more.

Prostate Massagers

Prostate massagers are designed for those endowed with a prostate gland. These toys have a narrowed tip that directly stimulates the P-spot, or the prostate gland, located 2-3 inches inside of the rectum. Milking the prostate is not only proven to reduce the risk of prostate cancer, it also feels out-of-this-world good.

With the aid of a prostate massager, you get a shot at a hands-free orgasm and multiple male orgasms. That’s right — you can orgasm (more than once) without so much as touching your package. The most classic version out there is the Aneros. Once you insert this massager, all you have to do is contract and release your anal muscles in a relaxed position. Then, you wait ­— for the best orgasm of your life.

Choose The Best Anal Toy

All of these toys sound great, you’re thinking. But how do I choose?

Picking your first anal toy just depends on your experience level with anal penetration. If you’re a beginner and you opt for an 8” inflatable dildo, I admire your courage. But realistically, you want to pace yourself in order to feel the real pleasure of anal stimulation. It’s fun and rewarding to start simple, and graduate towards more intense levels. Remember that anal sex toys for men and women are the same.

Beginners: Start with a butt plug or anal beads less than 1.5 inches in diameter. Play with different ways and positions to use the toys, and try combining them with partner play or masturbation.

Remember than anal sex toys for men and women are the same.

Intermediate: If you’ve used a butt plug or beads before, add an anal dildo to your collection. You can use an anal dildo, vibrating or not, to explore different pleasure points inside of your rectum. If you’re ready, play with deeper penetration.

Advanced: Perhaps butt plugs, anal beads, and dildos are old news to you. If you have a pussy, try out a little double penetration in both the anus and vagina. You can always advance your anal play with bigger dildos. If you have a prostate gland, you should have had a prostate massager yesterday. On top of filling up your ass, the pleasure is extremely intense. Prostate massagers should only be used with extreme caution and by advanced analysts. You can also combine a cockring with a prostate massager for enormous orgasms.

Important: Regardless of your experience level in the anal department, you cannot skip the lube. Using a thick, gel-like lube is the difference between pain and pleasure. To learn more about different lubes, refer to Chapter [X].

Using Anal Toys For Pleasure

As you will soon realize, your anus is a tight place. And despite its seriously strong muscles, anal tissue is incredibly thin.

Because of this delicacy, you have to be careful using anal toys. Don’t use homemade anal toys. Anal fissures and tears are quite common, and can result in a number of imaginable difficulties. If you follow the two basic rules to anal play, you’ll reduce your risks of pain and discomfort:

  1. Use more lube than you think you need. Then use a little more.  
  2. Go slowly. The more tense the muscles, the more likely the tissue will tear. Insert the toy slowly, one bit at a time. Then, relax. Wait until your muscles release before pushing the toy in a little further. Then relax again, and so forth.

When you first start dipping in the back door, you can do it with your partner or by yourself. Whichever makes you more comfortable. If you feel nervous about it, start solo. The sensation of anal sex with toys is thrilling and foreign. It does take some getting used to, which you’ll probably do faster on your own.

You can use your fingers, but chances are you’ll wind up with a sore wrist. That’s why it’s helpful to adopt an anal toy into your informal education.

The sensation of anal sex with toys is thrilling and foreign.”

Anal toys are also exciting for partner play. You can entrust your partner to use the toys on you while you focus on relaxing. This way you can pay attention to the sensations and magnify the pleasure.

I can’t stress this enough: staying calm is the key to anal pleasure. Make sure that you are in a comfortable, safe environment before you start playing with anal toys. If your ass stays clenched the whole time, you’re guaranteed to end up butt-hurt.

Butt Wait…

Before you buy your anal toy, make sure you read Chapter 2 to learn about the safety of various sex toy materials. Certain materials are dangerous, like jelly, rubber, PVC, and Cyberskin. They are more likely to be toxic and porous, increasing the risk of bacteria, viruses, or genital irritation.

If you want to be sure your toy is safe, stick to medical grade-silicone, glass, metal, or steel. These materials are top quality and take away the risk of danger so you can focus what’s important — Y.O.U.

Frequently Asked Questions

Q: What is an enema? Do I need one for anal play?

A: An enema is a procedure that involves shooting a stream of liquid into the lower bowels to clean out of any waste. It is not necessary before anal play, but some find it helps them relax if they know they are perfectly clean. Many people just shower or bathe beforehand and feel relaxed enough.

Q: Does anal play always hurt?

A: Not always. If you use tons of lube and go extremely slow, you may not feel any pain at all. The key in avoiding pain is to allow the anal muscles to relax and stay disengaged. If the pain feels overwhelming do not proceed with anal play. In this case, you may want to ask a doctor what’s up.

Q: If I am a man, does anal play mean I’m gay?

A: Not at all. Nearly half of all straight men have engaged in anal sex at some point in their life for one main reason: it feels good. The types sex acts you engage in to feel pleasure do not correlate with your sexual orientation whatsoever.

Q: What type of lube should I use?

A: When it comes to anal-anything, the thicker the lube the better. Look for a lube that has the consistency of a gel. I personally like a water-based lube or coconut oil. Coconut oil is a natural, antibacterial, and anti-inflammatory option that makes everything go quite smoothly.

Q: Should I use a numbing cream?

A: No, you shouldn’t. A numbing cream means that you won’t be able to feel if they toys is tearing your anal tissue. This can lead to anal trauma, which can lead to an E.R. visit. A little pain is normal in the beginning, but you need to be able to monitor if the pain gets worse.

Q: Will it hurt afterwards?

A: It depends on how aggressive you were with the toy as well as the toy’s size. If you play with a big dildo, you’re probably going to be a little sore after. Particularly when it’s time to do your business. The discomfort should go away after a couple days. If not, or if the pain worsens, you need to call up your doctor.

Now that you know all about sex toys for men, women and anal, read on to discover accessories that make it all even better. Chapter 8: Sex Toy Accessories Make It Better