After doing enough research in this genre, certain sexual truths start to reveal themselves. Some of them are pretty harmless and airy, like the fact that pretty much everyone you know likes porn. Or the fact that casual sex is a concept we are starting to accept instead of condemn.
But some sexual truths are straight-up problematic. And a lot of them have to do with how we define and treat gender, sex, and orientation topics.
Consider even the sex toy industry, which is about as sex-positive as it gets. Many sex toy companies stick to heteronormative speech that presumes everyone out there is having P-in-V sex. (Unless, of course, it’s specifically a queer sex toy brand.)
Even if a sex toy brand is inclusive of LGBT communities, there’s not enough acknowledgement and mention compared to the attention straight communities get. It sucks, and not in the good kind of way.
Because a lot of sex toys serve multiple purposes. While they’re generally aimed towards a specific sex or orientation, their function can be quite broad.
The magic wand is a sex toy for everybody.
The magic wand sex toy epitomizes this truth. It has long been considered a female masturbation toy. Probably 99% of the content out there about the magic wand is speaking to straight women. And like we learned on the playground, leaving people out isn’t playing nice.
I’d like to suggest a newer and more accurate truth: the magic wand is a sex toy for everybody. Here, I’m going to tell you why it’s just as awesome for gay men as it is straight women. I know — it sounds a little surprising. But this is the hip, unexpected toy to add to your repertoire.
And you know what they say. Unexpected surprises are the best kind.
What Is A Magic Wand Vibrator?
If all you’ve ever heard about the magic wand sex toy had to do with clitorises, wipe the slate clean. We’re starting from scratch.
The first ever magic wand was the Hitachi Magic Wand, manufactured in Tokyo ever since 1968. It’s still one of the most recognizable sex toys, having been coined as “the Cadillac of vibrators.”
Originally it was meant for low back pain and sore muscles (ha, sure). But it didn’t take long for sex educator Betty Dodson to publicize the wand’s function as a masturbator. At first Hitachi was onboard, but got prudish in 1999 when it announced the wand was strictly meant for health purposes.
By 2013 Hitachi was sick and tired of the sexual innuendos surrounding their Big Buzzy, so they changed the name to Magic Wand Original… As if that would shift our motives.
The Hitachi magic wand is the real OG, but it has inspired tons of sex toy companies to make their own rendition.
But why are people gaga about the magic wand in the first place? Well, in addition to massaging out shoulder knots its vibration happens to be a real turn on. Because it’s not just yummy, pleasurable vibration — it’s knock-your-socks off, screaming-O kind of vibration.
Why Do Gay Men Need A Magic Wand Sex Toy?
Honestly, any man could use their own magic wand. The powerful vibrations of a magic wand are designed for any body part full of sensuous nerve endings — and your penis is one of those.
Gay and bisexual men are no strangers to sex toys — about 80% have tried a sex toy before. But it’s surprising to many that a sex toy offering just vibration (without penetration or any other purpose) would be a must-add to any collection.
Usually gay and bisexual men opt for dildos and non-vibrating cock rings, according to Kinsey Confidential. After that it’s vibrators, butt plugs, masturbation sleeves, and anal beads. The magic wand is definitely an nontraditional option — but that makes it kind of appealing, doesn’t it?
A lot of men aren’t crazy about the idea of vibration, I get that. But instead of writing it off or staying indecisive, just keep in mind that a magic wand does take vibration to a new level.
And slowly but surely, men are picking up on that. They have reported that using a magic wand with their partner or for masturbation leads to seriously intense orgasms. Although it might make you come really fast, you’ll come hard, in a way that has been described more than once as “explosive.”
How To Use A Magic Wand
Since the magic wand is technically a “body massager,” you can use it all over. There are countless ways to put it to work. Sure it can help you relax a stiff neck, but that’s not really the stiffy we’re talking about here.
Deriving the most sexual pleasure from a magic wand entails stimulating specific parts of your penis. Some areas feel better than others — and some methods might work on you, but not your partner. I’m telling you, this is prime exploration territory! I hope you’re feeling curious.
Before we get deeper (faster, harder, etc.), consider a few things. You can try out these magic wand tips by yourself or with your partner. And it doesn’t actually matter whether you start hard or flaccid.
Lastly, there’s a real chance that the vibration will be too intense. If that’s the case, put a fabric barrier between your cock and the wand.
1. The Glans (Head or tip)
The tip of your penis has by far the most nerve endings. Rub the head of the magic wand around your glans, focusing on the outer ridge. The outer ridge has the highest concentration of nerves, although you may not feel much if you’re circumcised. Massaging the glans can be a bit overwhelming, so start with the lowest vibration setting.
2. The Shaft
Try massaging the head of the magic wand up and down your shaft. (Hint, if you’re erect for this one, it’ll probably feel better.) The shaft of your cock actually has the fewest nerve endings. But focusing the wand on your shaft will help diffuse the sensations to prolong your orgasm a bit longer. If you’re tracing the wand all over your cock, you probably want to lather on a little lube for smooth sailing.
3. The Frenulum
If you’ve been circumcised, your frenulum may not be visible to you. But it’s that V-shaped area between your glans and shaft (on the underside of your penis). And for some, it’s uber pleasurable. Many men can simply hold the magic wand to their frenulum and will orgasm extra hard in a matter of minutes.
Try sitting back and placing the magic wand against your frenulum so that your cock presses against your stomach. Since you don’t have to move for this to be extremely stimulating, play with engaging your PC muscles (the ones you’d engage to stop peeing). This will boost the orgasmic tension throughout your body for an even more dramatic climax.
This tip can be super effective for men with erectile dysfunction (ED). Since you don’t have to have an erection to do this, a lot of men struggling with ED still find that they can orgasm using the magic wand on their frenulum.
4. The Base
Massage the magic wand against the base of your penis. This is an especially great method if the intensity of the vibration is scaring you a little. Put a little lube down there too, so you can easily rub the wand around the circumference of the base.
5. The Perineum
In case you haven’t heard, your P-spot is an erogenous zone full of hands-free orgasm potential. The P-spot is the nickname for your prostate, and you can massage it from the outside via the perineum. Your perineum is the stretch of skin between your scrotum and anus.
Press the head of the magic wand against your perineum. You may need to try the higher setting for this one, depending on how sensitive it feels. Try coupling the massage with a little penile stimulation, like oral sex or a hand job.
6. The Scrotum
Whether you’ll enjoy this one or not depends on your history with scrotal stimulation. If you normally don’t like anyone or anything touching your balls — there’s a good chance this tip will be a big nuh-uh. But try pushing the head of the magic wand against and around your scrotum. This probably won’t make you come, but can feel really pleasurable.
7. The Anus
No, you’re not gonna stick the magic wand up there. But you can still use the magic wand’s vibrations to stimulate the many nerve endings around and in the anus. The best way to do this is either with a wand attachment (more on this in a sec) or a butt plug. After inserting a butt plug, press the magic wand against its base. This will send the vibration sensation through your rectum. What’s not to love.
What’s Up With Magic Wand Attachments?
Your todo list is about to get longer — sorry not sorry. For every magic wand toy, there is a handful of accessories that go with it. And if you want to get the most out of your wand, you might have to try them all… Poor you.
Masturbation Cup Attachment: This toy has one piece that fits on the end of the wand, and one piece that is a cup which fits over the head over your penis. Coat it with a little lube and knock yourself out. The highlight of the masturbation cup is that you don’t have to move it around much. It just sits on the end of your cock while the vibration does the work.
Masturation Sleeve Attachment: If you want a little more movement with your attachment piece, the masturbation sleeve accessory is a better fit. But same thing goes — fill it with lube, slide it around your cock, and whack away. The sleeve is a better option if you like feeling vibration at the base of your penis, whereas the cup just stimulates the top.
Prostate Massage Attachment: There is one potential downfall with the magic wand: it doesn’t penetrate. But that case is already closed, thanks to the super effective prostate massager attachment. This accessory is designed for anal penetration, meaning its curves will stimulate the right pleasure points, like the P-spot. Lube up with this attachment and prepare to soar.
Accessories really make the bedroom a better place, but a note on these attachment toys. A lot of them are made out of jelly or rubber. These materials bring questionable chemicals to the table, and it’s something you should be wary of (for the sake of your genitals).
If you want a bonafide safe option, search for magic wand attachments that are made of silicone. They’re out there, but a little harder to find.
The Magic Wand As A Gay Couples Sex Toy
If the magic wand hasn’t cast its spell on you quite yet, try it out as a couples’ toy. You may want nothing to do with almighty vibrations but your partner may feel differently. And experimenting with the wand together might be end up being a fab party for two.
Here are a couple ways to use the wand together:
- Treat your partner to a little something-special. Use the wand to explore his downstairs. You can even tease him with the wand before his clothes come off as a creative foreplay idea. Yes, he’ll still feel a little something, the vibrations are that strong.
- Use the magic wand attachments on him. Giving him a prostate massage with the magic wand and P-spot attachment is something he’ll feel eternally thankful for. Just be careful with the P-spot, it’s a delicate spot and bruises easily if you’re not careful. If you really want to spoil your partner, use two magic wands at once. Put the masturbation cup attachment on one wand, and the prostate massager attachment on the other. He won’t know what just hit him, but he’ll probably ask you to do it again.
- Use the magic wand at the same time. Turns out, you can both share the heavenly vibes of the magic wand at the same time, it just takes a little finagling. Lay your bodies so that you’re facing each other and rest the magic wand between your cocks.
Lessons From A Magic Wand
I have a massive crush on the magic wand for a lot of different reasons. First and foremost, it’s a literal crowd pleaser. And call me a hedonist, but feeling pleasured is typically my first priority.
Aside from its rock-your-world vibration, the magic wand teaches us to change the way we look at sex toys. From single women to gay couples, this one orgasm gadget is changing sex lives around the world.
Which tells us that the labels on a sex toy don’t amount to much. Labels are a way to organize the aisles of a sex shop. They shouldn’t be ruling around your sex life.
If the magic wand could speak, this is what it would say (in a seductive, purring tone), let’s be open minded about who can use what toy, and how they should use it… Also, I really am good at back massages after all.